Rebecca Syndrome: Jealousy Of Former
Rebecca syndrome refers to those situations in which a person experiences jealousy towards their ex-partner. In fact, this type of feeling is very common nowadays, according to psychologists.
It can have many causes, ranging from low self-esteem to the compelling need to compare yourself to others. It can even be caused by the partner in some cases.
Let’s explore the problem in detail!
Where does the name Rebecca Syndrome come from?
This syndrome is named after Alfred Hitchcock’s film “Rebecca”, released in 1940 and based on the novel Rebecca, written by Daphne du Maurier. This film tells the story of a young lady who has an affair with a millionaire widower and ends up marrying him. Unfortunately for the new bride, the housekeeper and the rest of the servants of the house (an imposing mansion called Manderley) are hostile to her from the beginning.
The young woman is constantly compared to his ex-wife. The ex-wife is glorified and admired by everyone. Gradually, the protagonist begins to lose self-esteem and compare with the almost perfect image of the deceased woman.
As a result, she begins to develop jealousy for no reason, especially when she discovers that her husband’s relationship with his ex-wife was happy and peaceful.
What is Rebecca Syndrome: Jealousy of Your Ex-Partner?
Author Peter Van Sommers expresses his own opinion about this type of jealousy. He classifies it as “retrospective” in his work entitled Jealousy: What it is and who feels it. Jealousy is caused by the partner’s previous relationships.
This is why a person can be jealous even of a deceased ex-partner. Bulgarian writer Elias Canetti made a statement that fits well with this description:
A person with this syndrome imagines happy situations that the partner has experienced with his ex. Also, those with this syndrome assume that their former partners were or are smarter, more beautiful or more attractive, among others. Specifically, I think these people were almost perfect.
This makes jealous people behave suspiciously towards their partner, although the opposite can happen: they can feel superior. The truth is that this situation seriously affects the cohabitation of the couple, causes conflicts and can even destroy a relationship.
Causes of Rebecca Syndrome
As a study by researchers Scheinkman and Werneck points out, “jealousy is a complex relational experience, it is a visceral fear of loss.” This way of feeling includes thoughts and feelings that provoke actions and reactions that sometimes seem incomprehensible.
Is there a treatment for jealousy of the former?
